From time to time I watch the t.v. show "cops". It constantly amazes me the stupidity with which people react when confronted with a uniform and flashing lights. O.k. first you'r dealing with a person here who carries a pistol on their hip and can put you in lockup with bubba the buttranger. Aside from that the fines can add up to the point where you;ll need to get a second job {provided you have a first job that is} just to pay for it. You would think these guys would come up with at least believable lies to try to get out of the situations they are in. So, in an effort to help keep bubba's visitor book from overflowing I am listing these suggestions as:
THINGS YOU SHOULD NEVER EVER SAY WHEN PULLED OVER
I didn't realize my radar detector was off
Wow, you must've been doing about 120 to keep up with me
My taxes pay you'r salary
Hmmmm, I thought you had to be in pretty good shape to be a cop
My license? Sure, mind holdin my beer while I get it out? (As far as I know this is still acceptable in Texas and West Virginia)
Loved you in the village people
You aren't going to search the trunk are you?
I'm just trying to keep up with traffic. I know I'm the only one here.......that's how far ahead the rest of the cars are.
You wouldn't know anyone in need of a dozen "hot -n- now" donuts would you?
O.K. , so you caught me speeding, wanna try best out of three?
Pretend to be gay, ask him out.
When he says no, cry.
If he says yes, accuse him of sexual harrassment.
After you sign the ticket, hand it back and ask for another copy because you signed the wrong name.
Bet you can't keep up with me now that your on foot. (Drive away)
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My personal favorites are the drunk women who try to come on to the male cops. "You sure are fine, baby. Whatsay we go back to your place?" (And NO, that is not what I said that one time I got pulled over!)
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